Should I?  I wish I would of.  WHy didnt I?  If only I would have.  I wish I wouldn't of.  Can I rewind?   

Regrets.  The person you are today.  The person you wanted to be or the person you have become.  I look back, as Im sure many of us do, and we say so confidently "I dont regret anything as It made me who I am today".  That holds true on most days.  Most
Maybe you regret eating that brownie, or making that phone call, getting married, or being dramatic, or telling a white lie or having that last glass or not going to school or punching this guy in the face or not cleaning up spilled milk, or saying sorry or giving in or just following your heart, not your mind.  Maybe its a relationship with a family member  you havent mended or a feud with a friend that you dont even remember why your fighting anymore.  Our minds make decisions that our hearts dont agree with.  OUr heart  seems to arm wrestle with our mind - sometimes winning.  Sometimes our heart is wrong.      And Im not just talking about love.  Im not some love sick chick crying about a heavy heart.  Life is way more than bubble gum kisses and not going to bed mad.  Im talking about the insides of life.  the steps you take before you even put the roast in the oven to cook.  The steps are what make the roast taste so amazing when finished. 
I met a woman tonight who was upset about life.  Not love, life.  I instantly liked her like a moth likes the light.  She talked about how her day was terrible  -  how it was like a domino effect - one thing after another turned to shit - car, work, a friend.  So as shes sitting there, trying pinot noir from Willamette Valley - she said - I wish I would have never left my bed.  This is far from a life changing regret but these little tiny regrets we have that we could of changed to make our everyday life change for the better - we really just want to be happy and comfortable - thats all she wanted.  By the time she left tonight - she was smiling, had red cheeks and fully happy (maybe intoxicated too).  She forgot about her silly regrets.  And tomorrow she probably will not even think twice about it. 
I dont regret a lot - but I do have some.  Mostly its self reflection regrets.  Maybe in love a little too. but more importantly - Sometimes I wish I could have tweaked my recipe but If I was any more blessed I would shit gold.  Yes- I just said that.

Sometimes it lasts but sometimes it hurts instead


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