Grandma - "dont take off your church clothes - we are going back to have fish lunch"
grandpa - "What ??"(looks at her funny)
Gma - "dont take off your church clothes - we are going back to have fish lunch"" (noticably irritated)
gpa - "what?" (while holding his ear towards her like if he makes a funnel shape with his hand the words may flow in better and he will hear her)
Gma - "You damn Russian" (she pronounces it Roo - shen and by the way he is not russian which she knows but it makes him completely insane when she calls him this so......)
Gpa -" WOMAN - I am no Rooshen!!" (his face went from white to red so quickly I though he may pass out and im suprised he couldnt hear her say to keep his clothes but he heard ROOSHEN....in the midst of all this I hear the coffee water boiling in the background and know that my dreaded cup of instant coffee is on its way soon)
Gma walks over to the steaming kettle of water and pours herself and me a cup of water and brings it over to the table. She noticably has not poured him a cup of water and he notices this also and says -
Gpa "why didnt you pour me a cup of coffee?"
she is still ignoring him while she goes in the cupboard to take out the dollar store cookies that taste like cardboard. She grabs his favorite ones (ginger) which she actually doesnt like but she knows this will set him off as well that we are going to eat HIS cookies.
He is still standing there - leaning forward his hat cocked to one side (he leaves his hat in the truck so he can put it on right away after church like its a part of him) watching and waiting to see what she will do next when she sees her go for the cookies - That is it!!! he walks forward and is going to take back his cookies and she halls off and slaps his hand. He jumps like hes been shot and grabs his hand. She is trying not to laugh and she goes in for the 2nd cookie (HIS cookie) and shoves it in her mouth - on purpose again to make him mad - while he stands back like a cat ready to pounce.
Gpa - "Why are you eating my cookies"
Gma - "oh your cookies- waa waaa- well mikey go cry" (my grandpas name is Steve - not mikey- mikey is his brother that lives up north and shes mad at him so she compares him to my gpa which makes him as wild as being called a roo-shen)
He is now over the edge and pounces in on his cookies and grabs his empty coffee cup - she lets him take the cookies because remember she doesnt like them anyway. He pours himself a cup of hot water and comes over and sits - cookies in lap- stirs in some instant coffee and grabs a cookie and starts eating. I am still sitting there shaking my head.
He then offers me a cookie which I say "im good thanks"
He continues to eat his cookie with pride like he won them over from her. There is silence for a minute and then -
Gpa- " Gram what should I wear today?"
best moment of my day - the dreaded cup of instant coffee with them
THe real battle has yet begun